Harrassment

I'll tell you a story.

When I was eight or nine, I can't quite remember, my cousin and I, who was nine or ten at the time, decided to sell bracelets outside my grandparents house in the summer to raise money for charity. This is a quiet village in a nice area in the south of the UK. When we were selling, and I still remember it to this day, a red car pulled up filled with four men in their twenties, the men stared at us and drove on.

This was the first time I ever got looked at by an adult. Well that I had noticed. And even though I didn't understand what was happening I remember feeling a bit rattled. I moved on and didn't think about it again.

My friend RachDerp had an experience out running the other day. It's not my story to tell, but the man tried to get her in his car.

She made a brilliant video about it.

We started tweeting and I realised how often I have been groped and grabbed by men and been judged by my body. They weren't as extreme as RachDerps experience,  but if you're not ready to be groped or honked at it leaves you feeling... odd inside.

My sister (13) got groped last year when we went to the Aquadrome by a middle aged man when we went with Nina. I got groped age 13 at Coral Reef in a swimsuit in line for the water slides. I got shouted at by a bunch of not-yet-pubescent boys just two weeks ago. I got groped in front of my parents last year at Reading Festival but I was older so I felt much less rattled as I did when I was younger. I had a rapper with yellow teeth chat me up for 2 hours when he knew I was 6 years younger than him. I was honked at age 12. And I don't like it.

When I try to explain how I don't like this to teenage guys they don't quite understand it. They don't understand why I don't like it. Being checked out and whistles comes with a feeling of being uncomfortable. I want to have control and this doesn't give me any. And that's scary.

This shouldn't be happening. Not once have I said anything to the person. Not once have I done anything to the person. And I regret that. Because when no one says anything, it ends up with Jimmy Saville all over again. I'm so proud of RachDerp getting aggressive because I have never done that. And I wish I had.

So if anything ever happens to you, say something.

You may say I'm overreacting to tiny events that are "flattery." It's not though.

I know this brings down the tone of my last post, a fashion post, but it needs to be said.

I don't enjoy it. Speak out. Do something. Because you'll feel much better when you do.